A Brief History of Friends for Life

FFL began as an outreach program of the Church of the Good Shepherd. When it opened on Thanksgiving Day in 1992, it was a one-and-a-half-days-per-week program staffed primarily by volunteers, under the auspices of the newly formed Good Shepherd Community Services, Inc. The church offered a hot meal and emotional support in a safe environment. In that time people living with HIV/AIDS were stigmatized, myths about transmission were rampant, and treatment options were few and far between. The opportunity to once again eat meals serve on ceramic dishware surprised indviduals whose families had relegated them to the use of disposable dishes. To find welcome, rather than rejection, was much appreciated. The Rev. Dr. Allison Moore became the Executive Director, her contribution supported by the congregation of the Church of the Good Shepherd.

Services grew as needs and resources were identified. After a year or so, FFL obtained funding through the Ryan White Care Act, a federal grant to assist people living with HIV/AIDS. This allowed us to offer transportation services, meals, and support groups, to hire a part-time volunteer coordinator and program director. After a few years, Ryan White funded complementary therapists (acupuncture, massage, Reiki, chiropractic treatments), because they were very helpful in mitigating side effects of the newly discovered "cocktails" of drugs that seemed to keep the virus in check for more and more people. At its peak in 2006, FFL was a five-day-a-week program with a paid staff of four, a 10-member volunteer corps, a van, a peripheral staff of 13 service providers, and an annual operating budget of $300,000.

In March 2007 the federal Ryan White funds were eliminated, and then restored to $60,000. We asked participants in the program what was most important for them, and found that they most valued a safe place to gather, share meals, find information, and support each

other. Nelson Rivera, who had been volunteering in the kitchen and providing wonderful meals, stepped into the role of Program Director, still as a volunteer. With the dedication of Nelson and several faithful volunteers, FFL has survived as a smaller, but still unique and important part of the HIV/AIDS community. Ryan White continues to provide more than half of our funding (ca. $80,000 annually), and this combined with the financial support of church and corporate grants, private foundations, and donations of money and supplies add up to about $130,000 a year. An active and energetic board plans fundraisers and oversees the program.

In September of 2009 the Church of the Good Shepherd made its space available to a preschool with special needs. FFL moved to The Church of the Annunciation, in Oradell, NJ. It takes courage to invite a program into parish space. Annunciation and its Rector, The Rev. Dr. J. Barrington Bates, have graciously welcomed the program, and FFL looks forward to many years of friendship and reciprocal help.

FFL has developed relationships with other organizations serving people living with HIV/AIDS. Hospitals, clinics, other HIV and social service agencies, and current clients refer people to us for support services. NJ Buddies also offers transportation, support groups, and it offers substance abuse and case management for people living with HIV/AIDS. NJ Buddies sometimes provides transportation for our clients, and our clients use some of their services. Bergen Family Services and TOUCH, HIV agencies in the metropolitan area, come often. Planned Parenthood, CAPCO, and Lifeline are some of the agencies who provide pro bono day respite workshops for FFL. Only FFL offers complementary therapies, a day support program, and an evening Group for working individuals who are HIV-positive.